The Power of Accountability

I'll admit it.  It is hard to own our mess.  It is easier to blame your spouse, kids, boss, the lady who cut you off when clearly you had the right of way etc.  But putting the accountability outside of yourself also puts the power there.  And that is NOT where it belongs.

When we drop our belief in victims and accept that our world is an effect of our thinking and beliefs, we take that power back.  'Your thoughts are the precursors for your experience.  Thoughts, raised to the lever of beliefs become your provisional reality."* If you are ready to change your world, you have to first take accountability for what you have created.

Thanks so much for listening.  Let's take our power back and start creating from a place of love for ourselves and each other.
  

Transcript

Rise and shine, everybody. It's time to wake up with Susan. Spiritual awakening can be a beautiful, messy, and sometimes lonely journey. 

So let's do it together. I'm your host, Susan Sutherland. I'm an intuitive healer and spiritual mentor.

We are all called to rise up above our conditioning and limiting beliefs and shine our light on ourselves and others. So let's get to it. Hi, family. 

Thanks for joining me today. I wish I could say that we have found normal in my household now with back to school underway. However, I have two of my children who have birthdays within four days of each other and all in the first seven days of school, which I don't recommend. 

One star, two thumbs down. It's not the way to live because you're all of this back to school parents' night, sports are underway, and it's freaking chaotic. But it is what we know. 

And so while I can't say we've settled into normal yet, it's coming. It's coming. Usually by Labor Day, we've kind of gotten our routine down. 

And so we'll get there. But what I have had lately is a big old furry lessons. And I've been trying to, you know, sit with them and extract as much as I can to be like, Hey, universe, I don't need this lesson again. 

I get it. I get it. I get it. 

I finally get it. And I've been sitting with it. And I usually know that there's something for me to share in the podcast about it. 

Because a lot of times we are mirroring each other what we're going through. If you're listening to me, somehow I resonate with you. And often the things I'm experiencing, perhaps you will be experiencing when you choose to listen to this episode, because that divine timing is incredible. 

But I haven't figured out how to share it. And it felt like, you know, if I went several days ago and really tried to write my thoughts out or just start speaking about it, it would be like sharing an underdeveloped Polaroid where you can kind of get the picture, but there's not a lot of clarity behind it. And so I've just been kind of hanging on. 

And then, you know, questioning, am I procrastinating? Or, you know, what's going on? Well, y'all, I sat down to record a couple episodes for my book club episodes, meaning the A Course in Miracle workbook lessons for the book club. And Jesus came through for me, y'all. Jesus came through because the lessons like exactly sum up what I'm trying to get across. 

Now, I will say in most of this book, I would not rely on Jesus for clarity. I'm not downing the message. The message is very good. 

But the circle talk is often very confusing. However, we are using well, I am using a book called Understanding A Course in Miracles workbook lessons, which not only gives you the workbook lesson, but also some plain speak to help you understand it, which I find very valuable to kind of sum up what we're doing. But the beautiful thing about where we're at in A Course in Miracles right now is we've kind of gotten through the part where he's trying to undo everything that the church did to us and made made us believe to be true about, you know, needing to be God-fearing and all of this stuff. 

Like we've made it through that part already. And now is the part where it's like, hey, you powerful creator, this is your jam. So that's really cool.

And these two lessons, I mean, it is just like hitting the, the, oh man, what is the saying? Hitting the name, the hammer on the head. That's not right. You don't hit the hammer on the head, hitting the nail on the head. 

Anyway, it is spot on. It is spot on and the notes for it are really, really clear. So what I want to talk to you about today is, um, us really having that extreme ownership where it is the buck stops here. 

Everything that happens in your external world is a reflection of your inner world. Everything, everything, everything. So this is really tricky because we also live in a big shared reality. 

And so there's a lot of things that, that maybe we're not contributing to as much on an individual level, but the collective consciousness is contributing to. However, for your, you know, individuated perception of how you are experiencing our shared world, that is based on your inner thoughts and beliefs. So I really think this is important as we are in the back to school season because it doesn't matter if you are sending somebody back to school. 

This is kind of a reset time in our society, especially in America, where, um, even my husband's company, they have summer hours where they work one extra hour Monday through Thursday, and then they have half days on Friday. There's just a summer vibe, right? Everybody has a summer vibe, whether or not you have children in school. And then when, when, you know, late August comes, that summer vibe kind of tails off and it's a reset for us.

And it's a reset for us because the days start getting shorter and traffic starts getting more complicated and all of these things happen. And so we are all kind of called to reflect how, how are these things impacting me? And, um, what does that say about my inner world? So this reminder is for me as much as it is for you, but we have to look and any kind of complications, any kind of situations that are happening in our life, we have to look within and see what is the source of this and know that everything that is part of our experience is a reflection of our inner world. And I hear the buts like, but, but, but, but, but I didn't call her to cut me off in traffic. 

This one's from experience y'all like this happened last night on the way to my daughter's birthday dinner. Somebody came from behind, cut off my husband. He then, you know, I think swears, honks, and is temporarily outraged like, uh, uh, like being bad, you know, whatever. 

And then basically condemns all women drivers. Um, anyway, it was this whole thing, right? And, um, it's, it's very tricky to have a conversation when he's, when he's saying, I didn't do anything. Why are you blaming me for this? I didn't do this. 

I didn't do this. Well, in that denial there is, or in that statement is the denial that you are a powerful creator. You, you created it. 

And here's the tricky thing is your thoughts and beliefs create the circumstances for you to have the experiences that confirm your beliefs about women drivers, about the old people, about how this group of people acts, like whatever your beliefs are, you call to you the experiences to confirm it. So it wasn't first that they were bad drivers, that they were messy people, that they are slack, not hardworking, you know, blah, blah, blah. Like whatever your beliefs about anything are, the beliefs came first and then came the confirmation through your experiences. 

Cause I can promise you that I, I am in the car a lot, a lot. We've got a lot going on right now. And I am living in the car and I don't find experiences to honk and swear and do whatever. 

Those aren't part of, of how I live. Every once in a blue moon, it will be like a horn needs to be honked. But it is not part of my everyday existence because I don't hold a belief about these drivers that I need proven in my reality.

Does that make any sense? If not, don't worry. A Course in Miracles is going to help us through this because I told you I was struggling to find how to clarify this. But it's basically your experience, your eyes are thought confirmation devices. 

You are only seeing that which you already believe to be true. You can see that all in the political landscape right now. People are just confirming their beliefs. 

If you already think this about a group of people, guarantee you are going to find the examples to be like, aha, I knew it. It's just there. Your eyes are thought confirming devices. 

Um, and this happens in your relationship too. If you are saying this person never does this for me. He always does this. 

I never have help with this. What you're doing is calling into your experience, perfect examples of why that is true. You have set the tone. 

You have the belief that this is true. And now your experience gets to validate it for you. But, but, but it is true. 

It's always been that way. Okay, then we have to say what in you resonates with this experience. There is a belief that you are not worthy of somebody showing up differently for you. 

You are not worthy of being respected at your job place. If it is always true, and it is not in alignment with what you wish to be, you have to look at the underlying beliefs. But first understand that the belief is there. 

You are creating the reality. You are creating the reality. You are creating the reality. 

And once you accept that, you are so powerful. You are so powerful because you can be like, Wait, I don't want to create that reality. I'm going to look at those screwed up beliefs that say I don't deserve something better than that. 

And I'm gonna start plucking them away. I'm just gonna be like, Nope, I don't believe that. That doesn't work for me.

So okay, let me read you a couple of these little phrases from phrases, sentences, I'm gonna say phrases. Let me read you a couple sentences from the notes sections of the the two lessons we're doing in A Course in Miracles the next two days because they're like, bang on the money. It's lesson 189. 

What we see as our outer world reflects what we feel in our inner world. We have been given a choice between two possible worlds. We either see a fearful world or a world of love and mercy. 

This choice is not controlled by our intellect or logical mind. Rather, it is made through our feelings. The law of seeing confirms the idea that your world is a reflection of the creative power of your mind. 

Your thoughts and feelings are causative and determine how you will view and interpret the circumstances and events that seem to swirl independently around you. Your thoughts are the precursors for your experience. Thoughts raised to the level of beliefs become your provisional reality. 

Thoughts always come first and are the cause for the experience that follows. The law of seeing states that your experiences merely align and conform to what you feel within. Your ego is wrong to assert that there is some outside force that can cause you to lose your inner peace. 

So part of accepting that you're not a victim is that claiming of your power. When you are the reason for your bad day, when you are the reason for your complicated relationship, if he is a complete jerk and you can't leave in peace and just be like, oh, I deserve better than this. If it is stirring you in a whirlwind, then it is a okay. 

What was my vibratory level to attract this person? What was I seeing or lacking seeing in myself that made this seem like a good idea? Why did I not think I deserve better? And how can I work to know that I do now so that the next relationship is respectful, is of love, is not abusive? So we have to really look at when you say everything is my doing either by choice or by vibratory alignment. Like maybe I wouldn't verbally say I'm choosing to be in a disrespectful relationship. However, the frequency that you carry, that is your alignment. 

So when you say I am in control of this, you have the power to change it. So we have to stop pointing our finger. It's one of those things where they say like, if you point one finger out, there's three looking back at you. 

No, it is always you. Everything is an inside job. And I have to remind myself of that because I get so frustrated with Mark. 

Like he's not doing this. He's not doing this. Like, whoa, sister. 

What am I contributing to this? What am I believing that is creating this circumstance? What have I not healed that is allowing for us to have conflict on this topic? And if I take my power back and stop trying to find fault with him, I am able to find solution by seeing what I am meant to learn in the situation, what I am meant to learn about myself, my internal belief about how relationships work or, you know, issues and patterns that I have with conflict. Like one that has come up recently for me that started with the school and where our headmaster, um, uh, I just have some issues with the new headmaster and how he's handled some things. And it took me saying, okay, there was problems and somebody asked for a meeting to resolve it, didn't get a meeting and actually was terminated. 

And I'm like, wow, his, and then when I actually went to the headmaster, he basically said, if you don't want to continue sending your kids here, you have until July 1st to remove them. And I thought, wow, I'm approaching him as a concerned parent. And his response is if you don't like it, leave.

Well, that happened. And then another situation with conflict happened. And I'm like, wait a second, this has to be about me. 

This is not about the school. It might be showing up for other people in different ways, but this is my opportunity to really reflect on how I'm managing conflict. And then I can see an issue with a friend where she really, really frustrated me. 

I was about to say razzle-dazzled me. Like where did that come from? She really frustrated me in a big way. And I withdrew. 

Like my response was to essentially take my toys and leave. And I started seeing, okay, this came up and you were so heated about the school. And for this specific reason, his conflict management, what is that meant to show me about myself? And so I'm just telling you that because everything is reflecting back something about you for you to learn. 

And it's not for me to be like, Susan, you're an awful person. Look at what you did. It's like, oh, I see where that has shown up for me. 

I am going to take the next opportunity and see if I can handle things in a different way and really grow through those challenges. And new opportunities arise for me to handle in a different way. So anyway, there was more. 

Jesus brought us more in Lesson 190 that I want to share with you because it's still good stuff. All right. The source of your world is your mind. 

That pain, like your world, is the result of your own thinking. And there is nothing external that can hurt you but yourself. This is a world of perception, not absolute reality. 

As such, it is pliable and follows your will, thoughts, and beliefs. Your world is an effect of your thinking. An effect is neutral in that it has no causative powers of its own. 

Being an effect, your world has no ability to impact or create other effects. The world you see represents your thoughts and will change only when you truly want it to change. In each moment in time, you get to decide what you will value and why. 

This lesson asks that you accept responsibility for your world of dreams. It asks you to drop your belief in victims and victimizers and lay aside all of your ego's plans for self-defense. On the game board of time, just so you know, I'm not reading this in order. 

These are some sentences that I highlighted. Anyway, on the game board of time, you are the writer and director for all the experiences that you call into your awareness. You get to decide if you will star in comedies or tragedies. 

The world you see does nothing to you and has no causative power to affect anything. Your world only reflects your mind's wants, values, and desires. Nothing sources your experience but your own mind.

And nothing can rob you of your own peace unless you choose to write the script that way. Boom, mic drop. How's that for like, guys, we are accountable to our own lives. 

We are, we are creating it with our thoughts and beliefs. And the more you can understand that, the more power you have to change the script. To be like, wait a second, I don't want to star in this production. 

I'm going to rip up the script and start over. I'm going to find out like, why am I doing this? If you have been perpetually sick, if you have been really struggling for a long time, you have to get real with yourself. You have to get really real about what you believe. 

What are the beliefs that are creating this reality? And a lot of times there's an underlying, oh, what do I want to say here? Sometimes there is a benefit to our struggle. Sometimes there is a, maybe, maybe there is someone who dotes on you because you've been sick for a while. Like we have to get really, really honest with ourselves and say, how am I contributing to my circumstance? Even subconsciously, if I am struggling, is it because when I'm hurting, these people are nice to me? Maybe it's the only time you get loved on by your family. 

You know, like we have to accept 100% accountability and say, why, why is this happening? What am I gaining from it? And what am I willing to change in order to write a different script? So I, um, I just, I gotta give a shout out. I mean, not just Jesus, uh, on that lesson. And you know what? I don't really care if you believe, um, in Jesus or not, that it, it really doesn't matter. 

I'm saying A Course in Miracles is an excellent, excellent text and excellent lessons, especially if you were raised in the church, um, under any kind of indoctrination of, of being born into sin and living with, uh, heaven and hell and, um, just really a fear-based religion, um, which has a lot of contradictions of understanding that, that God is all love. And also if you don't do it this way, you'll burn in hell. So if you were raised that way, I can't recommend A Course in Miracles enough. 

If you weren't raised that way and you don't resonate with Jesus, then just say this is coming from the universe because it's for your ears anyway. And shout out to Thomas Wakechild who wrote this book that is helping us get through these lessons because I'm going to go and tell you some of them are big on circle speak. Like it's, it's, it's gets kind of complicated and to have a follow-up with just plain speak is dynamite. 

So anyway, I am over here. It's right now. It's a, it's a big awful moon. 

Do with that what you will, but I am going to be releasing that which doesn't serve me, which a lot of that the past couple of weeks has been finding fault in others, finding frustration in how other people are showing up instead of realizing what they're reflecting back at me. And when I'm frustrated, when I am finding blame in someone else, that is my work. That is my work to do. 

And so I'm going to be doing some releasing of blame and frustration of others knowing that those kind of triggers are only meant for me to help heal myself and realize parts of me that need to be witnessed. So I'm going to do an episode on that soon about finding those triggers and then working with your inner child to heal them. And also about patterns because, oh my goodness, how patterns been coming, coming up where it's like, Oh, show it a different way, show it a different way.

And and how to work through that. I hope you have a great week. I hope you feel empowered by this episode that you do, you get to create it. 

And by accepting 100% accountability, that means you're in power. You are empowered to change. You are empowered to create a life you love. 

And that's exactly what I want for you to have a great week. I love you. Thank you so much for joining me this week. 

Be sure to not miss any upcoming episodes by subscribing to the podcast. That way it's available automatically in your RSS feed. This is a crazy journey. 

Let's do it together.